The Baron Intends to Breed with this Woman...Fetch her for Him

During The Baron's heroic, daily slog through the intertubes, he often spies ads for t-shirts. Purportedly these "tees" are crass, clever, and funny, intelligently so.

While The Baron thinks intelligently funny should mean shirts that dispense liquor or launch a fusillade of sharp quills when the wearer is threatened (porcushirt?), he cannot help but be entranced by the spokeswoman for said vestments.

Look at her!! Look at the size of her mouth!

In most cases The Baron would find this to be a repulsive feature, but in this siren he finds it alluring and bonerifying.

Having read this far and assuming your unflinching loyalty to The Baron and his numerous, violent and unpredictable mood swings, you should have already begun packing your t-shirt model traps and bait.

The Baron will remain in his comfortable abode, drinking constantly and trying on various robes until you have captured, wrapped and delivered The Baroness-2 to The Baron's bed chambers for breeding purposes.

P.S. if you see The Baroness in the near future tell her The Baron went mule deer hunting in the badlands, and then try to knock her out with something so The Baron can get a head start.