There are few things The Baron hates as much as some high school drop out piece of shit trying to sell him a car over TV or radio waves. If you've ever listened to radio in CNY then you've heard Tony Fucillo from the Fucillo automall barking shit at you in a barely intelligible manner about hyundais. Mr. Fucillo is so bad at speaking in complete sentences that a second guy basically just sits there and repeats everything Tony says in normal people speak.
However, as bad as Fucillo is, there is a type if car commercial that irks The Baron to no end, the kid/dog angle.
Older kids vomit out some terrible lines, always trying to be funny. At some point, dad/grandpa/both chime in and seem surprised/enraged that his children/grandchildren are offering such RIDICULOUS SAVINGS! One time, The Baron was so infuriated by one of these commercials that he slammed his face straight through an orphan.
Younger kids / dogs are usually used as decoration during car commercials and almost exclusively on TV. In every single one, some bloated assmaster rants on about their prices and low pressure environment, sometimes in costume, then the shot fades to some kids / dogs / both sitting on or in one of the cars on the lot. The ploy seems to suggest: Hey! You can trust old Tony, even though he is very rat-like in appearance because he's managed not to kill this particular baby/dog during the filming of the commercial!
If you want to buy a car, just do what The Baron does, go to a police auction and bid your ass off on a vehicle that looks like it may still have cash or drugs hidden in it somewhere then use the proceeds to put a down payment on a entry level Zepplin.
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