Stupidest Song Lyrics Ever 001

Anna Nalik 2Am: "...Life's like an hourglass glued to the table..."

Holy fucking god! This has got to be the single worst lyric in any song....ever. And, The Baron is including caveman music here. This is what happens when retarded people think they're a philosopher just because they can flail at a guitar while pretending to be deep.

The Baron vomits with rage every time this fucking song comes on the radio. And, for some reason a ton of people love it. Worst of all, they think that the above line is brilliant. Are they fucking kidding The Baron?!

Let's pick it apart:

First of all, if you put 25 apes in a room and asked them to write a lyric about how life is a one way journey, by the time you turned your back, 23 of them would have already scrawled the above gem in feces on their desk surface (assuming they have desks) and the other two would be aggressively porking.

Anna Nalik has taken the most common tenet of ancient philosophy and thrown together an ape-shit-smear of a line, and at the same time, she's patting the bejesus out of her own back. The fact that people seem to love this song (there is an entire blog dedicated to this abortion of a line http://chrissilvey.com/weblog/?p=39) makes The Baron both sad and furious, furious with rage.

People who like Anna Nalik are the same type who think the moon landing was faked, who think irradiated food is radioactive and they are the reason that N (for nuclear) had to be dropped from the acronym NMRI (Wait, nuclear! I watch 24 so I'm an expert on nuclearism and I'll be damned if I'm letting that thing scan my brain tumor).

Don't take The Baron's word for it, have a look at what these assmasters have to say.

Russ said,

on September 4th, 2007 at 7:37 pm

I love this song
Lifes like an hourglass glued to the table says it all to me you cannot turn it back and every day that you live should be lived to be happy it is to short.

Really Russ? First maybe you should go back to first grade and learn how to write a sentence that makes sense. The Baron doesn't even think this rambling word sandwich has a subject, good greasy fuck! Second, "that you should be lived to be happy it is to short". Dear lord, is that what your thoughts sound like?


Jenny said,

on June 21st, 2008 at 5:37 am

Omg, I felt the same way. I heard just this morning, and the other day I’d been keeping an eye out for quotes that I wanted, and then I heard that line!

And then her last chorus! I can totally hook to that because my poems are the same thing for me, and her song is pretty much a poem.

You'd better be hot Jenny. "Omg...I can totally hook to that..." Jesus....fucking....christ. The Baron dropped from demi-god to savant on the intelligence scale just from reading that post. And, surprise, surprise, she writes her own poetry about similar themes. That right there is enough evidence for The Baron to conclude she is fat, very, very fat.

Need The Baron say anymore?